An Inch of Ashes
by Aristeia
Summary: The lies of scheming rivals result in a marriage of doubt and suspicion, marking the end of Zhen Ji's new start at life. Zhen Ji/Cao Pi, eventual Zhen Ji/Cao Zhi.
1. His Victory

**An Inch of Ashes**

_Chapter 1: His Victory_

**---**

_The east wind sighs, the fine rains come:  
Beyond the pool of water-lilies, the noise of faint thunder.  
A gold toad gnaws the lock. Open it, burn the incense.  
A tiger of jade pulls the rope. Draw from the well and escape.  
Chia's daughter peeped through the screen when Han the clerk was young,  
The Goddess of the River left her pillow for the great Prince of Wei.  
Never let your heart open with the spring flowers:  
One inch of love is an inch of ashes._

The One Unnamed (II) by Li Shangyin

---

"Good night, Mother," Zhen Ji said to Lady Liu before leaving for her private chamber.

Since Yuan Shao's defeat at Guan Du four years ago, Lady Liu's health has been deteriorating at an alarming rate. Humiliated and left with nothing, her husband almost immediately succumbed to death. He intended to pass on his legacy to his youngest son Yuan Shang, but many of his officials wished for the inheritance to go to his eldest son Yuan Tan. Even though their relationship was riddled with strife and tension, the brothers still managed to unite against Cao Cao the prior year. Unfortunately, they ended up tearing themselves apart at Liyang and officially turned against one another that day. Zhen Ji's brother-in-laws, who grew up loving and protecting each other, were now caught in the midst of a power struggle. They were intent on besting and conquering the other while her husband Yuan Xi was left in the middle, just as he's always been since the younger Shang was born.

_Funny how even the best of friends will immediately turn against each other when land and authority are involved,_ Zhen Ji mused in her mind as she recalled the fact that Yuan Benchu and Cao Mengde were once friends, much like how the two quarreling Yuan brothers were in their earlier years.

Lady Zhen has not seen her husband since the day his father named him the governor of You Province. Rather than accompanying him to a new region, she chose to stay in Yecheng with Lady Liu. In all honesty, Zhen Ji never loved Yuan Xi in the way a wife should (or, at least, how she _thought_ spouses should love one another). Originally from Zhongshan, Zhen Ji was immediately married off to Xi once Yuan Shao had heard of the maiden's beauty and charisma. Their marriage was never consummated due to Ji's feelings (or lack thereof); she cared for him as if he was one of her brothers. Much to her surprise, Yuan Xi was very understanding and didn't press the issue any further. Marrying out of love is almost unheard of in this day and age and he knew that his marriage would be no different. Besides, concubines were always an available option for the son of one of the most powerful warlords in China.

Exhausted from working all day and tending to her mother-in-law in between her chores, Zhen Ji finally made it back to her private quarters and eagerly retired to her bed. Although she was able to rest her body at night, her mind was never fully at ease. Rather than sleeping peacefully until the crack of dawn, most of her nights were spent lying awake, thinking of the inevitable capture of Ye and worrying incessantly of Lady Liu's health. Her husband's defeat, followed by his hasty death, and subsequently having to hear the news of her sons fighting against each other severely weakened the woman—both physically and emotionally.

_I can't imagine her pain, _Zhen Ji lamented. _I fear she will die of heartache._

As a little girl in Zhongshan, her mother, Lady Zhang, often told Zhen Ji the story of a visit she and her siblings once had from the famed physiognomist Liu Lang and how he sang praises of her, the youngest daughter. While he examined every aspect of her youthful face with the delicate touch of an experienced physician, he'd nod and smile as if in approval of something. Singling out the young Ji, he loudly proclaimed, "The exalted status of this girl will one day be indescribable."

Unable to hold back her suppressed feelings any longer, tears streamed down her sullied face, leaving fresh stains on her pillow. In her heart, Zhen Ji knew that Cao Cao would eventually arrive with his troops to ransack the city. She knew that he would order the deaths of everyone in the castle, of anyone in the Yuan family. She did not see the exaltedness of her situation; Zhen Ji only felt dread and never felt more alone in her life. The Hero of Chaos will surely arrive soon, signaling the deaths of Lady Liu and herself.

**

* * *

**

Having utilized the turmoil that followed Yuan Shao's death to his advantage, Cao Cao further fueled the dispute between Yuan Tan and Yuan Shang by recently accepting an alliance with the elder brother. In response to this, the younger Shang was almost certainly on his way to Pingyuan at this very moment to defeat his brother, leaving Ye occupied by only a handful of soldiers and completely vulnerable. For those reasons Cao Cao knew that this was his moment to strike the last remaining Yuan stronghold. It would be a swift capture for he sent Xiahou Dun, Xiahou Yuan, and Zhang Liao to ambush Yuan Shang during his march to Pingyuan and there were none in Ye capable of opposing him. So confident was the warlord he only brought a small number of platoons and was accompanied only by his younger cousins Cao Ren and Cao Hong and his now-eldest son (after the unfortunate death of his son Cao Ang at Wancheng) Cao Pi.

"Cao Pi," called the warlord, glancing slightly towards his right where his son rode his steed.

"Yes, Father?"

"We've arrived at Yecheng. When you enter the castle, leave no Yuan alive."

**

* * *

**

Zhen Ji awoke with a loud gasp to the shouts of the soldiers guarding the palace entrance. Covered in beads of cold sweat and her stomach twisting into a tight knot, she instinctively knew that Cao Cao and his men were outside the walls slaughtering the few guards the castle had. She quickly kicked the bed covers off her trembling frame and grabbed only her blue silk robe as she fled her quarters. The frightened Zhen Ji ran barefoot down the hall as she struggled to put the robe on. Stopping in front of the all too familiar ornate door leading to her mistress' chamber, she pushed it open. Quickly entering, Zhen Ji slammed the crossbar in place and turned around to catch her breath. She saw Lady Liu and her handmaidens huddled together on the floor at the furthest corner of the room. Most of them were sobbing and holding each other for support while some remained unnervingly calm.

Despite wanting to block the doorway with anything heavy she and the handmaidens could manage to move, Zhen Ji decided against it and solemnly walked over to the other women. She knew that even if they had managed to move all the dressers and even the bed against the door, the soldiers would still break through with ease. They were trapped and nothing could help them now.

A few handmaidens cried out in fear and others jumped in fright as they all heard the first pound on the sealed door. They all surrounded Lady Liu and braced themselves to prepare for what would come charging through. The door was easily broken by a makeshift battering ram and a small handful of soldiers quickly piled in. Seeing only helpless and unarmed women, they all lowered their weapons for they perceived no immediate threat against themselves or their lord. Zhen Ji, who had remained so strong and firm up until now, began trembling from a combination of the cold draft entering the room and her growing fear. She held Lady Liu's hand tightly as if it would end their current ordeal. Even though it did not seem like much to her, it surprisingly helped the maiden stay collected and she hoped it was doing the same for her mistress.

A man of high stature—obvious to any with sight due to his elaborate armor as opposed to the common uniform worn by the troops—stepped in last, the soldiers moving aside to clear a path for him. Young and even handsome to Zhen Ji's eyes, the man said not a word as he examined the room and the group of maidens huddled together. He stopped in his tracks as his eyes met her own. Despite the tears rolling down her face, Zhen Ji's fierce, uncompromising gaze seemed to intrigue and even enamor him. The man stepped closer towards the terrified women and faced Lady Liu.

"I am Cao Pi, son of Cao Cao," he introduced himself. "Lady Liu, who is this maiden?"

Cao Pi glanced towards Lady Zhen, indicating who he was referring to. Choosing not to answer him just yet, Lady Liu let go of Ji's hand to remove the jade comb that was placed in her hair. She left it on her lap as she turned her attention back to Zhen Ji. She gathered her daughter-in-law's hair and fashioned it into a bun, securing it with the jade comb. Reaching under one of her pillows, Lady Liu took out a handkerchief and wiped Zhen Ji's face clean of the dirt that tainted it. Tears welled in her eyes as she held the maiden's face. Lady Liu wanted to thank her for all that she's done. She wanted to let the young woman know that she thought of her as her own daughter. She wanted to tell Lady Zhen so much for they both knew that this would be the last time they'd ever see each other. Instead, Lady Liu gave her a loving look, hoping that everything flooding through her heart would somehow be delivered through her eyes. She let go and faced Cao Pi.

"This is Lady Zhen, the wife of my son Yuan Xi."

His eyes widened in awe as he looked at her a second time. He thought the woman was captivating before even with her disheveled hair and dirtied face, but now she was the most radiant maiden he ever laid eyes on. Her face was as flawless as porcelain, as clear as jade. Enthralled by her unparalleled beauty, Cao Pi knew that he had to have her. He did not care if she was already the property of another man—he had to make her his.

"Ah, such a beautiful flower to be found in such a forlorn place," praised Cao Pi. "Come with me, sweet maiden. Grant me the honor of returning to Xu Chang by my side and I shall spare your mistress of the fate my father has ordered."

Zhen Ji's hand reached her mouth as she let out a small gasp. She was in shock at the sudden twist of fate and turned towards Lady Liu who merely nodded, even encouraging her with a small smile. This alone gave the woman enough courage to speak.

"Yes, anything you wish, My Lord," Zhen Ji replied softly, albeit with a hint of hesitation, as she bowed her head towards Cao Pi and to her new future.

**

* * *

**

**Benchu** – Yuan Shao's style name

**Mengde **– Cao Cao's style name

**physiognomist** (physiognomy) – the art of determining a person's character or personal characteristics from the form or features of the body, especially the face

**

* * *

**

**Note:** I've always loved the story of Zhen Ji and her untimely end. I also like the many rumors regarding her time married to Cao Pi and thought it'd make a great story. This is my second attempt at writing a story based on the relationship between Zhen Ji, Cao Pi, and Cao Zhi. The first one was titled One Inch of Love is an Inch of Ashes and was uploaded back in 2003. It was left incomplete so hopefully I finish the story this time around. I'd also like to add that I tried making this historically accurate regarding the ages, relationships, areas, clothing, technology, and so forth (I tried, so please don't be bothered too much if you find an error). I made the characters younger than they were during the time this story takes place, but I'm pretty sure I listed the age differences between most of the characters correctly. If the differences are incorrect then I either made a small mistake or made the change on purpose (such as with Zhen Ji and Cao Pi because I am going by how old they are in the Dynasty Warriors series). Some circumstances will be based on fact, plausible theories, or made up entirely by myself (of course ;P). So, enjoy! Any feedback is welcomed and greatly appreciated. :3 Oh, and a lot of the events that took place in this chapter are from Zhen Ji's biographies up on kongming (dot) net. Check 'em out!


	2. Across the Stars

**An Inch of Ashes**

_Chapter 2: Across the Stars_

**---**

_The east wind sighs, the fine rains come:  
Beyond the pool of water-lilies, the noise of faint thunder.  
A gold toad gnaws the lock. Open it, burn the incense.  
A tiger of jade pulls the rope. Draw from the well and escape.  
Chia's daughter peeped through the screen when Han the clerk was young,  
The Goddess of the River left her pillow for the great Prince of Wei.  
Never let your heart open with the spring flowers:  
One inch of love is an inch of ashes._

The One Unnamed (II) by Li Shangyin

**---**

It was nearing _zǐ_, the Hour of the Rat. While most people were sleeping soundly in their beds at this time to prepare for the day ahead of them, the palace of Xu Chang remained brightly lit with festive lanterns. Laughter and multiple conversations filled the enormous banquet hall; the guests wished to celebrate until dawn for it was the 7th day of the 7th month. Not only did that make it _Qi Xi_, the Magpie Festival and the most romantic day of the year, but it also marked the wedding of Cao Pi and Zhen Ji. Earlier this day, the rest of the country celebrated the holiday with their loved ones—girls in all counties carved melons, played games, and prayed for a good husband while women made wreaths and gave offerings to the star Zhi Nu. Lady Zhen had done the traditional melon carving as a child for many years, but this year she celebrated _Qi Xi _by getting married in the presence of her new family and all else who recently became a part of her life.

Traditionally, Cao Pi and Zhen Ji would have had to partake in various rituals with their families in order to wed. They skipped everything for it would have consumed weeks of their time. Instead, the two went straight ahead into their wedding ceremony after about a week of planning because it was not her choice to make; she was taken in by Cao Pi. The actual ceremony took place hours ago and was followed immediately by the _xǐ-jǐu _that was still going on. From the looks of it, the banquet would not end until early morning!

Zhen Ji sat at the largest table with her new husband Cao Zihuan; her father-in-law Cao Cao; and her new brothers Cao Zhang, Cao Xiong, and Cao Chong. She looked around the vast banquet hall and spotted a very familiar face, Zhang He—whom she had met him long before when he used to be an officer under Yuan Shao—chatting merrily with Xiahou Yuan and Cao Cao's personal bodyguard Xu Zhu. Close by were Xiahou Dun and Zhang Liao getting into what looked like a friendly argument. Miaocai's son Xiahou Ba was entertaining all those around his table by pestering his cousin Xiahou Mao and his wife Cao Qinghe with his drunken antics. There were far more guests seated throughout the hall that appeared to be enjoying themselves immensely, but Zhen Ji just could not see them all. Nonetheless, she was grateful for every single person's presence.

This was her second _xǐ-jǐu_, but it was so much more lavish in every way possible. Every single aspect was much grander and larger compared to her previous wedding reception with Yuan Xi. The date Cao Pi chose probably had something to do with bringing out the best in everyone for it was the beginning of autumn and noticeably cooler, which meant no one would complain for hours on end about the summer heat. It is also the time of year when orchids blossom and bloom throughout the entire month. To make use of the orchids, hundreds were picked and utilized to decorate the hall. Their pleasant perfume gave the entire hall a wonderful scent and almost certainly kept the guests in a cheerful mood as they feasted and drank to their hearts' content.

"Sister!" exclaimed the boy next to her.

"Yes, little Cangshu?" Zhen Ji acknowledged him brightly.

Cao Chong amazed her with his wisdom despite being a 9-year-old boy. She knew he must have done something extraordinary in order to have a style name at his age. Ji had not a clue as to what he could have done to have been bestowed such an honor and planned on asking her husband later to find out.

"Please tell me the story again, the story of _Qi Xi_!"

It was moments like this that reminded everyone around him that Chong was still but a child. He had a boy's curiosity and a grown man's wit—a fine balance for a young one as gifted as him.

"Anything for my little brother!" This was one of her favorite stories so she was happy to oblige. "Long ago, a handsome young cowherd named Niu Lang lived alone at the foot of a mountain and always prayed to the heavens for a wife. One night, as he went to the spring in the nearby woods to fetch some water, he came across a beautiful young maiden bathing in it. Niu Lang was mesmerized by the sight before him and spotted the woman's robes on a nearby rock. They were absolutely radiant and appeared to shimmer brilliantly under the moonlight. He immediately knew that she was a fairy for everything about her—even her clothes!—transcended all else on Earth. Knowing that she would not be able to return to Heaven without them, the cowherd took the fairy's celestial robes and hid. After frantically searching for her missing robes, Niu Lang revealed himself to her. Left with no other choice, she agreed to be his wife."

Zhen Ji paused for a moment and reflected upon what she had just said. She could not help but notice the similarities between the story and her own life.

Ji shook her interrupting thoughts off and continued, "Zhi Nu was the fairy's name and her duty in heaven was to weave colorful clouds. She grew to love the man whom she at first considered her jailer and even bore him a fine son and a beautiful daughter. Although she was happy and content with her new life, Zhi Nu often found herself missing her sisters and her father, the Emperor of Heaven. While cleaning around the house one day, the fairy stumbled upon a lacquered chest. Curious, she opened it to find her missing celestial robes. The temptation was too much for her—she put them on and flew up towards the sky back to Heaven in tears.

"Left behind, Niu Lang wept all day and night with their children. One night, he decided to take his children to the spring where he had first met their mother Zhi Nu. It was the first time he had been there since they had gotten married. They watched in awe as a large bucket attached to a very long rope descended down from the sky to collect water from the spring. He assumed that all the fairies in Heaven were too afraid to come down to Earth to bathe ever since Zhi Nu went missing. Niu Lang climbed into the bucket with his children and was slowly pulled up into the clouds to be reunited with his beautiful wife who greeted her family with kisses.

"The joyous occasion was cut short by the Emperor of Heaven. He was furious to find the mortal who had stolen his youngest daughter from him years ago in his domain. So wrathful was he that he summoned a river that appeared to flow endlessly into the sky—he intended to separate the lovers forever. Zhi Nu was condemned to weave clouds all day and night on her loom while Niu Lang was left to take care of their children. Their days were spent weeping bitterly at their wretched lives and watching each other longingly from across the silver river. Their sorrow was so great that their tears flooded the Earth below.

"The animals of the world met to discuss the never ending rain. A single magpie volunteered to fly up to the heavens to see what the cause of the flood was. The little magpie saw the lovers on opposite sides of the river looking out toward the other. After talking to the cowherd and learning of their cruel punishment, he flew back to Earth and told the rest of the animals the tragic story of Niu Lang and Zhi Nu. So heartbroken were they, all the magpies decided to fly up into the sky to form a bridge over the river so that the cowherd and the fairy could meet again.

"The Emperor of Heaven bore witness to it all. He pitied the star-crossed lovers and allowed the magpies to relieve the two of their grief and misery once a year. Now, on the 7th day of the 7th month, all the magpies in the world fly to Heaven so that Niu Lang and Zhi Nu may be together for a single night—this night."

"So, they're together right now on the bridge of magpies?" pondered Cao Chong.

"Yes, little one. At this very moment, the lovers are cherishing every minute they have together before daybreak when the magpies must fly back to Earth."

"Then why is it raining? Wouldn't that hinder the magpies' task?" Cao Chong wondered aloud.

"When it rains during any other time of the year, it is a sign of the lovers despairing," Zhen Ji began to explain. "On the other hand, if it rains on this particular night—as it is now—it is said that Niu Lang and Zhi Nu are shedding tears of joy. The magpies do not mind it. In fact, I bet they're weeping with the lovers right now."

She heard multiple sighs and turned to see the other patrons at the table. Zhen Ji and Cangshu were so immersed in the story that she had nearly forgotten that there were others seated with them. Judging from their dreamy and contemplative expressions, it appeared that everyone else—Xiong, Ziwen, and even Lord Cao Cao—had been listening to Zhen Ji's storytelling and enjoyed it just as much as little Cao Chong. It seemed that even the feared Hero of Chaos still retained a fondness for enduring folktales. On the contrary, Zihuan seemed to lack everyone else's enthusiasm for he looked quite distressed. Before Lady Zhen could ask her husband what was troubling him, Cao Pi excused himself from the table and walked off to one of the balconies overlooking the sleeping city.

**

* * *

**

There would be no rest for Cao Zhi tonight. He and his poor horse Rou Xin had been traveling for days. While they were able to rest and recuperate at roadside inns the previous nights, tonight they remained on the road and traveled with frequent, but short, breaks in between. His main concern was to arrive at Xu Chang as soon as possible so that his steed could finally get the proper rest she deserved. Zhi had her since she was a young foal and was glad to still have her by his side. Rou Xin had taken her master to Chang'an and after four months she was now taking him back home to the capital. She is indeed a loyal companion.

Ever since the death of Cao Ang, it appeared that Cao Pi and Cao Zhi were seen as the main contenders to become Cao Cao's heir. Zhi was favored for his intellect and incredible poetry while his eldest brother was shrewd and full of cunning. This rivalry placed upon the two was partly the reason why he left Xu Chang in the first place. Zhi was much more introverted than Zihuan and disliked having to compete with his brother over their father's subjects' approval and praise. Cao Pi gained the support of the court long ago after spending so much time around them (even as a child his brother was clever). The only reason why Lord Cao Cao had not yet named Cao Pi as his heir was the faith he had in Cao Zhi. Mengde saw tremendous potential in his third son and would do anything to see all of it mature and come to fruition.

"Hang in there, Rou," Cao Zhi tenderly spoke to his steed. "Just a few more _li_ until we arrive at the city. We're almost there."

**

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**

Ever since Cao Pi left the table to be alone outside on the balcony, Zhen Ji stopped paying attention to the discussions led by her father-in-law or her brother-in-laws. She would nod occasionally and her eyes would meet theirs to make it appear as if she was listening, but her mind was elsewhere with her husband. Ji did not want to be rude, especially towards Cao Cao, but she could not help her wandering thoughts. In her head she was going over all the possibilities as to why Zihuan had left so unexpectedly an abruptly. She came to the conclusion that she had said or done something to upset him greatly. Zhen Ji did not know whether to feel confused or troubled by this thought.

She saw someone out of the corner of her eye. She glanced towards the figure nonchalantly and saw that it was her husband walking out of the hall of orchids. Crestfallen, her eyes fell down towards her lap.

"Lady Zhen."

She lifted her gaze and found Cao Cao looking right at her.

"Yes, Lord Cao?"

"Maybe you would like to take a stroll outside—perhaps in the gardens," Cao Cao suggested with a friendly smile. "You have not been able to see them due to the days spent preparing for the wedding."

The maiden's eyes lit up. She smiled back, guessing that he knew what was troubling her. He was merely giving her an excuse to leave her own wedding reception to chase after her husband.

Zhen Ji replied, "Oh, yes. That would be nice."

"Being indoors all week certainly isn't good for one's health. A calm night like this spent out in the gardens would mend that, I'm sure."

"I agree. I believe I have earned a little fresh air today," she played along.

"Indeed."

She got up from her seat and bowed deeply. "Thank you, Father."

**

* * *

**

Zhen Ji ran briskly down the hall towards the back entrance where the main garden was located. After finding it empty, she looked further in the nearby tea room and found that it led to another enclosure. The moon-shaped doorway led to what looked like a scholar's garden. Though it was night, the moonlight was enough to reveal the garden's splendor. The walkways and connecting pavilions bordered a large pond with trees hanging protectively over most of the area. Numerous viewing stones with pleasing formations were placed in the pond and elsewhere amongst the foliage. While most of the plants looked to be slowly withering and most of the trees ready to release their autumn leaves, a certain few—the orchids and the chrysanthemums—were in full bloom. The walls encasing the entire vicinity were low, allowing the sky to be completely visible. The scholar's garden was so breathtaking that Zhen Ji nearly forgot about her search for a moment.

Much to her surprise and relief, she found Cao Pi leaning over one of the small, curved bridges near the chrysanthemum bed with his back facing the direction of the entrance. Not wanting to bother or alarm him, she approached her husband slowly and with caution.

"I much prefer chrysanthemums over orchids," Cao Pi declared suddenly without turning towards her. "Don't you?"

Startled, Zhen Ji replied with a little confusion, "My personal favorite is the peony, but chrysanthemums are just as lovely."

A little surer of herself, she took his silence as an opportunity to place herself next to him on the bridge. As the newly wedded couple looked out, she felt his hand rest on hers. The maiden turned her head in surprise. The gesture was pleasant, but was something she did not expect Cao Pi to ever do.

"My Lord," she began slowly as she searched for her next words. "Why did you leave the banquet hall so suddenly? I was worried and came searching for you."

Cao Zihuan closed his eyes and drew out a long breath. "I'm sorry, Ji. I just—I don't know. During the day, the palace and the rest of the city is chaotic and always in motion. Court officials scribble away for hours on their scrolls, merchants travel in and out, the entire city is lively with oxen and horses and children as they laugh and run around to get to where they need to be. Once the moon takes the place of the sun, everything is still and I can finally find the order I seek when I look up towards the heavens."

Zhen Ji stared at him and found herself puzzled at his response.

"You left the celebration because you wanted to be in the company of the stars rather than your family and guests?"

"I suppose you could say that," he murmured. "I went out to the balcony for a little fresh air and found myself here when the rain had passed."

"I see."

"_Qi Xi_ was the reason why I had chosen our wedding to be held today," confessed Cao Pi. "I have heard the story countless times, but it was when you narrated it that I realized I was just like that thoughtless cowherd."

She was shocked that he too had noticed the similarities between themselves and the tragic couple.

"What are you saying, My Lord?" asked Zhen Ji.

"Do you love me?"

A bit stunned by his bluntness, she struggled, "Well…"

"Please, be honest with me," interrupted Cao Pi. "Shortly after I brought you to Xu Chang, I heard that you did not even consummate your marriage with Yuan Xi. You had been with him for who knows how long while only a few weeks have passed since we returned from Yecheng."

"It's true that I did not love him romantically," she said. "It is also true that I agreed to come back with you because I was left with no other choice—"

"Like Zhi Nu," he finished.

She was again bewildered by his frankness because Zhen Ji was not planning on saying that at all. Instead, she was going to mention how she wanted to protect Lady Liu from any and all harm.

"Yes, like Zhi Nu."

"I must sound so foolish," he said solemnly, shaking his head. "Here I am speaking of fairy tales."

"I find myself falling in love, though," she told him honestly, completely ignoring his previous words. Ji let out a small laugh to lighten the mood and asked playfully, "Have you forgotten that the fairy falls in love, too?"

Zihuan smiled with relief and held his wife in his arms for what felt like hours. He released her from his embrace and they both turned towards the night sky. The endless silver river was bright and the stars flickered against the darkness with an unusual strength and luster. He stretched his arm out before them.

"Look," he pointed. "There's Niu Lang, the star of the cowherd."

"And Zhi Nu placed right across the river," added his wife.

As Zhen Ji gazed at the stars with her husband, safe in his arms once more, the maiden felt a warm contentment. It was a familiar sensation to her; she felt this way before during that fateful night she left Yecheng. Cao Pi carried Zhen Ji the entire way from Lady Liu's chamber to his steed because she had ran throughout the halls barefoot that night. When she agreed to come back to Xu Chang with him, Cao Pi was unable to control himself and couldn't wait for her to gather her belongings. Instead, he decided to carry her to save her feet from the dirt and rubble outside. As she held onto him, Zhen Ji buried her face into his chest because—unbeknownst to him—she secretly wept the entire way. She saw him as her chance at the happiness and stability she always longed for.

Zhen Ji held onto her husband tightly as she recalled that vivid memory. She was correct that night: from this moment she knew that Zihuan would be the one to protect her and love her. Worry and anxiety would no longer be a permanent part of her day because the maiden was now safe at the capital, surrounded by famous military officers she had heard of previously through exciting tales. She now has a stately new family and a devoted husband who truly loved her. This warmth has been missing her whole life up until now. Rather than viewing Cao Pi solely as her own opportunity for happiness, she knew now that she was the same thing to him.

The night sky was tranquil and the air was cool against their skin. Lady Zhen smiled to herself as she rested her head against her husband's chest. She wished upon the star of the weaving maiden to always be this happy for the rest of her days. Ji felt assured that Niu Lang and Zhi Nu were smiling upon the two of them.

She whispered softly, "I'll never let you go."

_Just promise me that you'll never fade away and become a shadow of the man that you are tonight._

**

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**

He smiled broadly and let out a sigh of relief. Rou Xin was now trotting through the city and he could see the palace close by. His steed has grown noticeably more relaxed; Cao Zhi guessed that Rou Xin could sense that she was nearing home and would finally be able to rest properly tonight. She was excited and he could not deny his own feelings either. Despite his rough moments with Cao Pi in the past, he missed his family dearly and could not wait to see everyone again. Zhi was a little disappointed, however, due to the hour he would arrive. Everyone would be long asleep by then, leaving the reunion to take place in the morning.

Cao Zhi sighed peacefully and looked up at the vast darkness above. The moon was luminous, the breeze was cool and steady, and the stars were noticeably brighter tonight. He pointed out the various constellations and stars he could recognize in his thoughts: the Turtle Beak mansion of the White Tiger of the West, the Winnowing Basket mansion of the Azure Dragon of the East, the lovers Niu Lang and Zhi Nu. He probably missed all the Magpie Festival celebrations—and, oh, the delicious food!—and found himself cheerless at the thought, but he could always find a reason to celebrate in the morning with his family. Zhi felt encouraged about his return just by looking at the two lovers; he knew that his arrival would bring about great change. The stars sparkling brilliantly in the sky seemed to tell him so.

* * *

**zi **(pinyin: _zǐ_) – one of the Earthly Branches (a system used to measure time) which took place from 11:00 PM to 1:00 AM; the Hour of the Rat

**Qi Xi** (pinyin: _Qī Xī_; literally means "The Night of Sevens") – a festival celebrating the story of the lovers Niu Lang and Zhi Nu; the Magpie Festival; called Chinese Valentine's Day in recent years

**the story of Qi Xi** – the origin myth of the stars Altair (represented by the cowherd Niu Lang), Beta Aquilae (also known as Alshain), and Gamma Aquilae (also known as Tarazed and represented by the two children along with Alshain) in the constellation of Aquila; the star Vega (represented by the fairy weaver Zhi Nu) in the constellation of Lyra; the Milky Way galaxy (represented by the silver river in the sky); and why the two stars are separated by the Milky Way (their union is a possible reference to the Perseids, a meteor shower that is active between July and August)

**xi-jiu** (pinyin: _xǐ-jǐu_; literally means "joyful wine") – a wedding reception which is considered far more important than the actual wedding ceremony

**li** (pinyin: _lǐ_) – a traditional Chinese unit of distance (note: The measurement has changed many times over the centuries. One _li _was as little as 77 meters to as many as 576. I'll be using the supposed Han _li_ which was roughly around 415 meters.)

**scholar's garden** - a place for solitary or social contemplation of nature

**new style names mentioned** – Zihuan (Cao Pi), Miaocai (Xiahou Yuan), Cangshu (Cao Chong), Ziwen (Cao Zhang)

**

* * *

**

**Note: **I had originally not intended to dedicate a chapter to Cao Pi and Zhen Ji's wedding. I even had two chapters written out, but while I was in the process of editing them, I thought about possibly doing away with them both to write a chapter on the wedding that would help portray the two as a closer couple. The astronomy (sorry if it confused anyone Dx) was unplanned as well! I was thinking of the four seasons and how I have to pretty much guess when most of these events occurred (because I'm just THAT anal :P). I settled on the story taking place during late summer/early fall and was doing research and stumbled upon _Qi Xi_. I've heard the story before (albeit the Korean version XD), but there are multiple versions of it. I went with the two versions I liked best and mashed it up into a single story. I realized that it reminded me of how Cao Pi took Zhen Ji with him which is where I got the inspiration for how Zhen Ji notices the similarities in the middle of her storytelling.

The title of the chapter is a play on the phrase "star-crossed lovers" (and the name of the love theme from "Star Wars"! :DDD). I thought it would serve as a nice foreshadowing (since I'm sure many of you know what happens to Zhen Ji in the end xD) and I liked how it related to the whole "star theme" of this chapter. I'd also like to throw in that I researched how style names and given names were used back in the day, but I won't be using them properly because I like switching between the two often so the text won't feel repetitive. ;P

Reviews and feedback are always very appreciated! :P They're what keep us writers going. Well, er, most of us writers. Lulz.


	3. The Rear Palace

**An Inch of Ashes**

_Chapter 3: The Rear Palace_

**---**

_The east wind sighs, the fine rains come:  
Beyond the pool of water-lilies, the noise of faint thunder.  
A gold toad gnaws the lock. Open it, burn the incense.  
A tiger of jade pulls the rope. Draw from the well and escape.  
Chia's daughter peeped through the screen when Han the clerk was young,  
The Goddess of the River left her pillow for the great Prince of Wei.  
Never let your heart open with the spring flowers:  
One inch of love is an inch of ashes._

The One Unnamed (II) by Li Shangyin

**---**

The sunlight peering through the open window was finally able to reach the sleeping figure on the bed. Stirring slightly at the warm sensation, Zhen Ji turned over and stretched her arm out toward her husband. Still resting her head lazily on her silk pillow, the maiden slowly opened her eyes to see for herself whether or not Cao Pi was still lying next to her. Like every morning, he was gone. Forcing herself out of her husband's bed, Lady Zhen groggily made her way towards the washroom to get ready for breakfast in the dining hall (that is, if it was still morning). Zihuan's sleeping quarters lacked any sort of timepiece, so she would just have to hurry over to the dining hall and hope that everyone was still there and that it was not yet past noon.

_I wonder how long I slept in,_ Zhen Ji thought as she bent down over the basin to wash her face.

**

* * *

**

_Behind the tightly locked doors, Cao Zhi hunched over his desk. The boy was surrounded by room dividers on his sides to create a makeshift study room in his private chamber. He was always the studious type, preferring to read books and memorize essays over anything else. His scholarly demeanor is what helped separate him from the rest of his brothers_—_his half-brothers Cao Ang and Cao Shuo were dutiful and filial, Cao Pi was sly and full of ambition, Zhang had a love for and excelled in the martial arts, and little Xiong was vivacious and always full of life. He got along well with the older Zhang and the younger Xiong, but Ang was always away (probably off doing tasks to help prepare for his future as their father's heir) and Pi preferred being in the company of the officials while he hardly ever saw Shuo since he lived in another city. Zhi did not mind not being able to see his brothers often because that left him free to read the works of and learn from the past poets and philosophers._

_Satisfied with his daily reading, he put away Master Kong's __Analects__. Feeling creative, Cao Zhi opted for poetry and grabbed his favorite brush, a small sheet of wrinkled mulberry paper, and a tiny bottle of ink. He sat there as he thought of what to write, the tip of his brush poking at his chin. Forming the first line of his poem in his thoughts, he dipped his brush in the ink bottle and began to write whatever flowed forth._

_There was a loud knock on his door. Startled by the sudden noise, the aspiring poet drew a large line that traveled straight across the sheet of paper. Visibly annoyed, Cao Zhi slammed his brush down as he stood from his seat._

"_Who is it?" Zhi yelled, aggravated by the intrusion of his thoughts, as he hurriedly cleaned up the mess before him._

"_Cao Pi!"_

_Cao Zhi let out a heavy sigh as he walked over to the double doors and unlocked them. Pulling the doors open, he stared at his older brother (who also appeared slightly vexed) standing before him._

"_What do you want?" grumbled Cao Zhi, folding his arms across his chest.  
_

"_Father wanted me to inform you of the completion of the Bronze Sparrow Pavilion," Cao Pi spat with just as much disdain._

_Zhi blinked in disbelief and asked, "That's it?"_

_Annoyed further, he grabbed the circular handles to push the doors close._

"_No, wait!" Pi protested, stopping his brother from shutting him outside. "He also said that he was going to take us to the pavilion today!"_

"_Wonderful. Now, please leave," muttered the younger one._

_Irritated by his brother's blatant disrespect towards him, Cao Pi angrily barked, "You _dare _talk to me in such a manner?"_

"_You didn't need to come _now_ to tell me this! You could have just come when it was actually time to leave!" hollered Zhi._

_He slammed the doors before his brother could reply and heatedly smashed the crossbar down to keep the messenger from coming inside. Sighing with exasperation, Cao Zhi returned to his little improvised cubicle to continue with his latest poem._

**

* * *

**

_About an hour passed and before he knew it, there was another knock on the door. Cao Zhi put his brush down and quickly placed his poem on the side of the desk to allow the ink to dry._

_"Yes? Who's there?" the boy called.  
_

"_It is your father. Hurry along, Zhi. Your brothers and I are ready to visit the pavilion."_

"_Yes, Father," he answered quickly and obediently._

_The little poet grabbed the nicest garment he could find. His random pick was actually quite fitting to wear outdoors. It was his dark red _zhiju-_style_ shenyi _given to him by his mother Lady Bian as a birthday present and was made for informal and casual occasions such as this. He may be in the presence of his father, but they were only going out near the woods. It wasn't as if the Emperor himself would be there. Cao Zhi tied his sash sloppily (he always had trouble with sashes and was usually assisted by his mother) before leaving his private chamber to find Cao Cao and five out of his six brothers waiting for him down the hall. Baby Chong was only a year old so he was probably being taken care of and doted on by their sisters near the rear palace._

_As Zhi got close enough to see everyone's faces, it was obvious that Cao Pi was still angry with him due to their little fight earlier. He immediately diverted his gaze and looked up at his father. With a smile, Cao Cao handed his tardy son a small bag._

_"You can hold on to this for me, Zhi."_

_The boy held it close and replied with his own smile._

_The siblings walked out of the palace of Xu Chang, following their father's lead, and into the main gardens. They made their way towards the woods and followed the dirt trail that led to a clearing of rolling hills behind a young pond. At the foot of the smallest hill, near the edge of the pool, proudly stood the Bronze Sparrow Pavilion._

"_Ah, here we are," Cao Cao sighed with a hint of satisfaction. He sat down on one of the benches inside the structure and his sons followed suit. "As you all know, I had to move the capital here from Chang'an due to political unrest. It was to keep the Emperor safe, but I knew he was tired of moving from place to place and missed the old capital at Luo Yang. So, I had the Bronze Sparrow Pavilion commissioned to make Xu Chang feel a little more like home to Emperor Xian, even modeling it after the famed Phoenix Pavilion found in the splendid gardens of the old capital. So, in order to celebrate its completion, I ask all of you to compose an ode to it."_

_Cao Cao motioned for Cao Zhi to stand up and come forward. He took the bag that was entrusted to his son and opened it to reveal scraps of paper, small brushes, and several tiny bottles of ink. Mengde handed each of his sons a brush and a piece of paper so that they could write down their poems. Known more for his military exploits than for his prose, Cao Cao was nonetheless a magnificent poet and was glad to have passed down his love for the language arts to at least two of his sons. As he sat back down to observe his sons' reactions, he could see that everyone was still thinking hard and forming their first few lines while Pi and Zhi already had more than enough written down. Zhi was particularly excited and wrote with more fervor than his older brother. The warlord moved on to admire the surroundings of the pavilion while he waited for at least one finished poem._

_After reading through his finished product, Zhi beamed proudly and proclaimed, "Father, I'm finished!"_

_Cao Cao turned around in surprise and amusement at his son's enthusiasm. "Please recite your poem for us, Zhi."_

_The boy cleared his throat and confidently read:_

A pleasant promenade beside His Majesty:  
They mount the tiered tower, delight their spirits,  
And view the teeming richness of the realm,  
The sphere his sagely virtue rules.  
These gates he built pierce the mid-sky;  
The double pylons float to the crystalline.  
Splendid viewing rooms sit suspended there,  
Linked chambers seem to hang above the western wall.  
They peer down on the ever-flowing Zhang,  
Whose gardens give promise of teeming glory.  
Look up! The gentle solemnity of spring;  
And hear! The lovelorn cries of every bird.  
May those proud towers stand until Heaven's end.  
Our house has gained a twin fulfillment.  
Our benevolent influence spreads across the realm,  
Winning universal homage for our capital.  
Even the splendor of Huan and Wu, ancient hegemons,  
Pales beside his sagely grace and wisdom.  
Most blessed! Most marvelous!  
His generous favor, extending far and wide.  
Lend the sovereign house your aid  
That unto the four corners peace may reign.  
Our king is on a scale with Heaven and Earth,  
Radiant as the light of sun or moon,  
Ever honored as the ultimate principle,  
Immortal as the sky's sovereign star.

_He stood up and could not help but clap at his son's marvelous treatise. Cao Cao hugged his young son and told him warmly, "Well done, Zhi. Well done."_

**

* * *

**

Cao Zhi arrived at the palace in the early hours of the morning after a large gathering in the banquet hall. Sadly, he missed the celebration and never learned what it was for; he only found servants and caretakers cleaning up after all the guests had left. Rather than making a scene, Zhi slipped away to his private chamber (which was just the way he left it, to his surprise) and fell asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. He could always surprise everyone by waking up early to be the first in the dining room for breakfast. To his dismay, however, he has woken up much later than he wanted after dreaming of a time of naivety and youthful joy. Perhaps the memory Zhi dreamt of so vividly was the reason why he would not stir—he wanted to relive that moment and remember the better and more relaxing times of his childhood.

It was now early afternoon. Zhi grumbled to himself over how long he slept in. Usually he had more self-control than that, but his exhaustion stemming from his long journey home got the better of him last night. Instead of being the first in the dining room like he wanted, Zhi would probably walk in and find a full table consuming their second meal of the day. The young man stopped outside of the entrance leading to the private dining room reserved only for his family and guests of his father. Closing his eyes, Zhi exhaled deeply. He could not deny his nervousness and anxiety; this will be the first time seeing his family in over four months. The poet hoped that Cao Pi would now be a little less hostile towards him since he was absent from Xu Chang for a long time. Even though they did not get along as well as he did with some of his other brothers, Zhi did miss his elder brother just as much as he missed the rest of his siblings. Family was always first in this culture and Cao Pi was still his brother despite their previous quarrels in life. Their little argument the day they visited the Bronze Sparrow Pavilion was so much smaller compared to the others that took place as they grew older and more stubborn.

He took a deep breath and finally parted the opaque curtains that separated him from the diners inside. His palms were sweaty and he could feel his heart race faster and faster with every step he took. When Zhi got close enough to the table (although it was a dining room, it was still large enough to accommodate a normal household), he heard gasps and laughter erupt. The first person he saw was his younger brother Xiong who had become full of glee and bewilderment. He looked at the other patrons and saw little Cangshu, his half-sister Qinghe, their father Cao Cao, and Cao Pi himself.

"Zhi! Welcome home!" Xiong laughed merrily as he stood up to hug the brother he hasn't seen in months.

"Yes, welcome back to Xu Chang and to your family," smiled Qinghe. She was always Zhi's favorite sister due to how close they were in age, only a year apart.

Cao Pi greeted him with a nod and even acknowledged Zhi aloud, "Please join us for a light lunch, Brother."

"Big Brother Zhi, it's been so long!" cried Cao Chong.

Cao Zhi was overwhelmed and had no idea that his return would make him and everyone else this happy. Although he had only said one thing to Zhi, he could tell Pi was kinder than how he was before he left home for Chang'an. Cao Zhi found this new side of his brother to be a bit unusual, but he thought nothing more of it as he bowed to Cao Cao before taking a seat next to him. Cao Cao did not say anything yet, but Zhi was able to spot a glint in his father's eye that signaled his delight.

"So, when did you return?" asked Qinghe before taking a sip of her tea.

"I actually arrived last night. It was rather late when I finally reached the palace so I just went straight to bed. I did not want to go out of my way looking for everyone when I knew you were all most likely sleeping."

"Ah, yes. You probably came after the _xǐ-jǐu_," Xiong nodded. "Terrific celebration that was. Everyone was so tired when it was over! I know I was!"

"_Xǐ-jǐu_?" Cao Zhi pondered aloud. He grew excited and asked, "Who got married? Was it Zhang?"

"Actually, it was me, Little Brother," answered Cao Pi. He smiled to himself as he remembered his wedding night.

"Oh, congratulations, Zihuan! When do I get to meet your new wife?" He was genuinely happy for Cao Pi; Zhi was afraid that his brother would end up marrying that horrid Lady Guo.

"Maybe later today or tomorrow. Whenever it is most convenient for my wife."

_Wow. He sure has changed. I thought he was going to introduce her to me whenever it was most convenient for _him, Cao Zhi thought in amusement.

"Cao Zhi," a new voice boomed, full of authority. Everyone immediately turned their attention to Cao Cao who remained silent up until that very moment.

The son dipped his head in a bow and answered, "Yes, Father?"

"You have been away for some time now. As you can see, we have all missed you a great deal," the patriarch began. "While you were at Chang'an, I felt it was time that you received your style name. Although you are eighteen, a full two years before most men receive theirs, I believe you are ready and deserving of one. In fact, you showed your merit and worth early on even as a child."

This was the last thing he was expecting his father to say and it left him speechless. "It—it would be a great honor, Father!" Zhi exclaimed, unable to contain his excitement. "Thank you!"

"Very well then," Cao Cao grinned proudly. "Your capping ceremony will be held next week."

**

* * *

**

Zhen Ji rushed towards the dining room and quietly hoped that she did not miss her husband. She could not believe how late she slept in—it was past noon! Quickly making her way down the halls, her empty stomach seemed to holler at her for food and nourishment. Lady Zhen was in such a rush that she did not properly fix and do her hair. Rather than adorning her hair with ornaments, she instead fashioned it into a bare bun. She rather liked not having various accessories on her head for once; to be presentable in the eyes of officials and nobles would mean putting more weight on her head and strain on her neck.

The maiden would have been at the dining room by now if she had not stopped by her quaint chamber. Even though Cao Pi and Zhen Ji were now husband and wife they still maintained their own private quarters.

"Ugh, I'm going to place some of my own things in his chamber to save me from another disaster like this," Ji muttered to herself as she paced down the never ending hallways of Xu Chang.

As she passed through one of the open courtyards, believing that it would help her get to the dining room faster, the woman found herself not recognizing the area at all. Irritated with herself for getting lost, Zhen Ji placed her hand on her hip and let out an exasperated sigh. The maiden has lived in Xu Chang for only a few short weeks and was not yet familiar with every part of the palace. A couple of weeks was not enough time to know where every walkway led to and which rooms led to which courtyards and where every single crevice was located; Xu Chang was much too large for that.

Zhen Ji stopped her unruly thoughts as she heard sobbing nearby. It came from the largest structure that stood on the opposite end of the courtyard. Curious, Lady Zhen crept closer towards the building and entered quietly in hopes of remaining unnoticed.

To her surprise, she was greeted with silence from six young women that appeared to be around her age. They were all surrounding the only woman who was seated. She looked up towards Zhen Ji. The woman's face was red and her eyes were sunken—she was definitely the one who had been crying before Zhen Ji stepped inside. Half of the women before her had looks of loathing in their eyes while the other half had inquisitive expressions. Zhen Ji became nervous at the awkward stares and silence. She let out a cough that echoed throughout the giant room to clear her throat.

"Um, hello," she started hesitantly. "I am Zhen Ji, wife of—"

The sobbing that led her inside appeared again. Ji turned towards the crying woman with a puzzled look. Before Zhen Ji could say anything, the maiden's head shot up from her hands.

"We know who you are, Lady Zhen," she spat out between sobs. "You are the one who took Lord Cao Pi away from us!"

Ji winced at the resentment that curled off of the woman's words and half the women's eyes. Inside, Lady Zhen cursed her foolishness for she now realized that she wandered into the rear palace. Fully aware of the vast amount of wealth and power Lord Cao Cao controlled and had at his disposal, Xu Chang's rear palace most likely had separate rooms to shelter his own consorts and those of his sons' as well. Unfortunately, the woman found herself in the room containing her own husband's concubines.

"He would have married someone eventually." Another concubine stepped out from the group to reveal herself. She was quite attractive and Zhen Ji could immediately tell that this particular consort was full of confidence and one of the few that did not abhor her.

"Lord Cao Pi would not have married all of us. Be realistic, Lady Pan," the consort scoffed once again. "He even told all of us before that he only wished for a single wife."

"B-but—"

"From the looks of it, his wife appears to be a nice woman. At least he didn't end up marrying that snake Lady Guo," she said in a cheerful manner as Lady Pan began tearing up once more. The rest of the consorts giggled and agreed.

"Who is Lady Guo?" Zhen Ji wondered aloud.

"A consort we all despise!" chimed in a new voice.

"How rude of me, I did not even introduce myself. My name is Consort Li," the confident concubine said with a bow. Zhen Ji returned the bow with a smile. "Anyway, Lady Guo is Lord Cao Pi's favorite concubine. She's manipulative and basically had him wrapped around her finger before you arrived."

"Me?" asked a surprised Zhen Ji.

"Yes, Lady Zhen. She was absolutely _furious_ when she found out that Lord Cao Pi returned from Ye with a blushing bride-to-be," Consort Li chuckled, probably imagining a fuming Lady Guo.

Zhen Ji grimaced. This Lady Guo would prove to be a problem for her, she was sure of it. Women are envious and spiteful creatures. They have the power to manipulate things to their advantage and turn people against each other. Life was merely a game and women like Lady Guo were in it to win at whatever the cost. Although Ji did not know her and has not met her yet, she just knew that Lady Guo was one of those women who only found satisfaction and joy in another's anguish and misery. That is the only reason why so many of Lady Guo's fellow concubines would hate her so—they were all either jealous of her and they themselves are like the women Zhen Ji described or Lady Guo was the selfish and conniving one. She was sure it was the latter, judging by how the other women talked and thought of Lady Guo.

Unsure of what to say, Ji changed the subject sheepishly. "I did not learn all of your names."

"I am Consort Yin."

"Consort Song. Pleased to meet you, Lady Zhen."

"My name is Consort Zhu."

"And I am Consort Su."

"So, what brought you to the rear palace this afternoon, Lady Zhen?" inquired Consort Li as she motioned for Zhen Ji to join them at the round table.

With all the women seated, the kettle, teacups, and steaming baskets were now visible. It appeared that she would have something to eat after all!

Zhen Ji sat down with the concubines and answered, "I was actually on my way to the dining room. I overslept and rushed there, but got lost."

"Oh, don't worry," reassured Lady Zhu, noticing her embarrassment. "Xu Chang is an enormous palace and it's very easy to get lost here."

"Yes, it is quite large," Lady Zhen agreed with a curt nod. "I cut through the courtyard outside, thinking it would lead me to the dining room, but I found myself here. I heard crying and came inside to see what the trouble was."

"That was Lady Pan, of course," laughed Lady Song, much to the chagrin of Consort Pan. "We were having tea and she accidentally spilled some on herself."

"No, on the new robes Lord Cao Pi gave me!" Consort Pan complained.

All the women laughed at the distressed Pan, annoying her even further.

Despite knowing the answer, Ji asked, "Are all of you Cao Pi's consorts?"

"Yes, but he has a few more. I believe they're out somewhere with Consort Guo," replied Consort Yin as she poured everyone a cup of tea, stressing Lady Guo's name with utter disdain.

"What exactly has she done to have earned everyone's anger?" inquired Ji before biting into her first dumpling.

"The question is what she _hasn't_ done," muttered Lady Li. "Guo Nüwang, where do I begin with her? Well, one day when I sprained my ankle, I was receiving a little more attention from Lord Cao Pi than usual. Even a little thing like that upsets her so. Nüwang feigned extreme exhaustion so that he would visit her more than I."

"She even managed to get a concubine banished! Her name was Lady Tan. She did something to infuriate Lady Guo, but no one is sure what she exactly did. Nüwang made Lord Cao Pi suspect Lady Tan of theft. At first, the 'crimes' were minute things such as stealing Nüwang's jewelry and borrowing her combs without her permission. Knowing that it had to be much more drastic than that, the witch planted one of Lord Cao Cao's pendants under Consort Tan's pillow, inciting Lord Cao Pi's wrath," explained Consort Su. She herself has grown so angry while telling the story that her knuckles were ghostly white from clenching her fists so tightly.

Zhen Ji sat there with her eyes wide and full of disbelief. She never heard of a woman so treacherous and found herself a little angry towards her husband for believing in Lady Guo's stream of constant lies. As Zihuan's wife, Ji knew that she would be Lady Guo's next target. She did not even want to imagine the things the concubine would do to her in order to regain her title as Cao Pi's most favored. Zhen Ji did not ever want to meet Guo Nüwang and did not want anyone to speak of her in the concubine's presence. She would have to make sure that Lady Guo would know nothing of her so that she would have nothing to use against her. Lady Zhen would give the woman absolutely no leverage. Unable to stomach anymore, Zhen Ji finished her tea and her fourth dumpling before setting down her chopsticks.

"Thank you for the light meal. It was just what I needed," Zhen Ji finally said something. "It was a pleasure meeting all of you."

"You're leaving already, Lady Zhen?" asked Consort Li, who appeared a little crestfallen.

"Yes, I'm feeling a bit tired and would like to retire to my quarters," Ji said wearily.

"Feel free to stop by whenever you wish, My Lady," Consort Song told her with a smile. "We don't always get many chances to meet others."

"I'll be sure to visit whenever I can!" promised Ji. "I feel comfortable enough to come again. I was afraid you would all despise me for being Lord Cao Pi's wife, but I see that isn't the case. If any of you are downhearted by this fact or if any of the other consorts I have not yet met are, please know that Lord Cao Pi can do as he wish. I may be his wife, but you are all his consorts as well. It is not my place to forbid him from seeing you."

"We appreciate your kind words, Lady Zhen," replied Consort Pan.

Zhen Ji got up and bowed to the other women and they returned the gesture. Turning away to leave the rear palace for her private chamber, she stepped outside and back into the courtyard. As the maiden walked down the hallway with a solemn look painted on her face, she thought of what she just told her husband's concubines a few moments ago. Jealousy is natural and she indeed wanted her husband for herself, but knew that just wasn't possible. Women were things to be owned; women were the property of men. Although Zhen Ji knew this since childhood, she secretly wanted to be able to voice her opinion against polygamy and concubinage. Such thoughts were all locked away in her mind for speaking those things aloud would mean voicing her opposition towards an established and accepted part of society. Polygamy and concubinage were the norm, but she did not understand what was so normal about having to share one's spouse with others. Her behavior and words in the rear palace are what Cao Pi would prefer so that is how she would have to present herself. However, it did not hurt to hope for him to do away with the other women, for him to love her and only her.

**

* * *

**

The lunch was fantastic. Cao Zhi could not even remember the last time he felt more satisfied and full. His father's words kept playing over and over in his head, still in complete disbelief at the fact that he would receive his own style name within a week. As Zhi went over possible style names that could be chosen for him in his head, he crossed paths with a maiden he has never seen before. In deep thought, the woman appeared troubled by something. She did not notice him as they passed each other. Judging by her plain robes, the direction she was coming from (she most likely just left the rear palace), and how her hair was up in a simple bun with no ornaments, Cao Zhi guessed that she was a concubine that arrived during his stay in Chang'an. Despite the simple manner in which she dressed, her beauty was unrivaled. He indeed found himself smitten and wondered what her name was and what upset her. It did not even occur to Cao Zhi that the woman he was thinking of was his brother's new wife.

**

* * *

**

**shenyi – **type of common _hanfu _(pinyin: _hànfú_; the historical dress of the Han Chinese people), a full-body robe

**zhiju – **form of _shenyi_ worn by males

**

* * *

**

**Note: **Wow, it took me quite a while to upload this particular chapter. I apologize for the wait (I just started college/university and haven't really found any time for this). Anyway, to explain a couple of things: I read that Zhen Ji often encouraged favored consorts and consoled the ones who weren't. She was said to have even encouraged Cao Pi to find as many women as possible for his benefit. I just took a little spin on that, making her appear that way only because it's expected of her and making her actually wish for monogamy. I thought that would be a little more interesting. Also, I received a handful of messages regarding Zhen Ji's "real name." Her real name isn't actually known. Some sources call her Zhen Luo, it was Zhen Mi in Luo Shen, and not even listed in the Sanguo Zhi. My explanation for using Zhen Ji: this is a Dynasty Warriors fanfic and the name Zhen Ji is used in the series. As for the poem, I got that off kongming (dot) net and included the sections the citations said was Cao Zhi's real poem. Granted, he was definitely much older when he wrote that compared to how young I made him in the story; that was just me being lazy. I didn't want to think of a poem and pass it off as something Cao Zhi would have written. X3

I compiled a list of Cao Cao's children and listed them from eldest to youngest. It isn't known what the exact order is and which year some were born in or when some died, so the list is largely fictional. I'll probably include the list in the following chapter, once again, due to my laziness. :D Oh, I'd also like to throw in that I have two or three ideas swimming around in my head for possible new fanfics. They're going to be vignettes dealing with similar topics and compiled into a single series (perhaps two). Keep a look out for that. :3


	4. The Bronze Sparrows

**An Inch of Ashes**

_Chapter 4: The Bronze Sparrows_

**---**

_The east wind sighs, the fine rains come:  
Beyond the pool of water-lilies, the noise of faint thunder.  
A gold toad gnaws the lock. Open it, burn the incense.  
A tiger of jade pulls the rope. Draw from the well and escape.  
Chia's daughter peeped through the screen when Han the clerk was young,  
The Goddess of the River left her pillow for the great Prince of Wei.  
Never let your heart open with the spring flowers:  
One inch of love is an inch of ashes._

The One Unnamed (II) by Li Shangyin

**---**

"Ah-hah! I win again!" cheered Consort Li as she clapped merrily. "A wager is a wager, Ji!"

In a playful manner, Zhen Ji let out an exaggerated sigh of frustration as she pushed the rest of her coins toward the other end of the table.

"I must say, Furen, I underestimated your _liu bo_ skills," Ji smirked at the older woman sitting across from her.

"Well, there isn't much to do as a concubine so we all like to keep ourselves entertained by playing games and gambling whenever possible," Lady Li glanced coyly at her friend from the corner of her eye.

"Rightly so," chuckled Zhen Ji. "You have a gift for the game, Furen. No wonder you were given this exquisite table!"

_Liu bo_ was usually played on a simple wooden board or on a slab of cold stone, but Consort Li instead had a gorgeous bronze table with a board built right on top. It was made of lacquer, the pieces made of clear jade, and the four legs holding everything up were carved with intricate designs. The table appeared to stand proudly in the corner of Furen's part of the room. It was much too lavish to have been found in a shop—Zhen Ji figured that her husband probably had it commissioned for his concubine after discovering her talent for the game.

The younger maiden was introduced to the game of _liu bo_ very early in life when she was just a little girl in Wuji. Zhen Ji was, however, not as well versed in the board game as Li Furen because she never found herself too interested in it. Most of her experiences in _liu bo_ consisted of watching her competitive brothers play or spotting old men gathered around several tables as she entered and left the marketplace with her mother and sisters. In the end, Ji was always more excited when it came to reading and writing. As a child, she constantly borrowed her elder brothers' brushes and inkstones in an effort to become more scholarly and to emulate the worthy women of antiquity. At the moment, though, Ji found herself wishing she had played the game more often during her childhood so that she would not have lost so many coins to her friend!

"It really is beautiful, isn't it?" Li Furen gave a warm look at her _liu bo_ table, lightly touching the patterned edge.

Zhen Ji nearly cringed at the sight, knowing full well that her friend was thinking of Cao Pi. She kept her promise to all of the consorts she met at the rear palace and visited whenever possible (which was almost daily). To her surprise, Ji ended up befriending nearly all of her husband's concubines. She enjoyed their company, but at the same time it was difficult for her to be around them. The maiden still has not gotten used to the fact that every single one of her newfound friends adored her husband and resided in the rear palace just for him.

Picking up the dice before her, she just gave a small smile.

**

* * *

**

"Zijian!"

Cao Zhi smirked to himself as he heard his brother call him from behind. His capping ceremony took place over a week ago, but he was not yet tired of hearing his style name. In fact, the young man found himself beginning to prefer it over his _míng_!

He turned around as he greeted his eldest brother. "Good afternoon, Zihuan."

"I just made the final arrangements. My gift for you will be arriving in a matter of days!"

"Oh?" Zhi replied in confusion. "For what occasion?"

"Your capping ceremony, Little Brother," laughed Cao Pi. "I'm sorry it has taken so long to get here; I had trouble thinking of what to get you."

"Brother, a gift really isn't necessary—"

"No, it is the proper thing to do, Zijian."

The younger one was amazed at his brother's kind gesture. Zhi was not used to how much more relaxed and amiable Cao Pi had become during his time away from home. He guessed that it was because Zihuan was now happily married. Despite being back for over a week, Zhi still did not have a chance to meet his sister-in-law. Nonetheless, he knew that she must be a wonderful woman to be able to bring out the best in Cao Pi.

"I'm sure I'll love it."

"Would you like to know what it is?" asked Pi.

Baffled, Cao Zhi stammered, "You want to tell me what my gift is _now_?"

"It is the least I could do since it's so late."

"If you want to, Zihuan. I really don't mind waiting, though..."

"My gift to you is a concubine!"

Cao Zhi's eyes went wide in surprise. He wasn't sure if he heard his brother correctly. "Wh-what?"

"A concubine, Zijian!" exclaimed Cao Pi. "It's that time again, so I chose one for you."

Zhi inhaled deeply, thinking of what to say next. He had completely forgotten—did not care for, rather—that now was the horrid time when new concubines were found and brought to live in the rear palace. It happened every three years or so and Cao Zhi was always pestered each time by his brothers or their father to choose a woman for himself. To everyone's confusion and annoyance, he did not agree with the practice and compared it to a circus act. The young man refused to have a consort and never liked how society treated women as mere objects that could be bought and given away.

"Pi, you know I've never wanted one before. Why do you think I am any different now?" Cao Zhi sighed, his temper slowly rising.

"You could use the company, Brother. They're not just for pleasure. Think of her as your eternal companion who will always be there for you!" laughed Cao Pi.

"This is no joke. I don't want a concubine."

Zihuan's laughter soon fell silent. "It's a gift! You can't just refuse a gift!"

The younger one could tell that his brother was also becoming irritated. Cao Pi's tone immediately became stern and cold—the voice Cao Zhi had grown used to since childhood. Zijian could not bear the thought of having a consort and would not accept his brother's gift at any cost.

"Well, I am!" Zhi nearly bellowed. "I refuse to keep a slave!"

In that moment, he felt like he had reverted back into a little boy arguing with his brother over a new toy. The past days of friendly banter between the two soon faded into the present disagreement.

"As you wish," growled Cao Pi. "I'll return it."

"Stop calling her that! These women have names!"

The older one glared as he angrily spat, "This is why so many question your—"

"People can think what they want."

**

* * *

**

The fight they had earlier was the first one in a very long time. To his horror, arguing with his brother actually felt normal which worried the younger Zhi gravely. Despite enjoying Cao Pi's kinder demeanor over the past few weeks, Cao Zhi was still not used to it and considered it a little unusual and strange. Perhaps they were like the tiger and dragon—bitter rivals eternally locked in combat with neither ever emerging victorious.

Zijian made his way past the main garden into the bordering woods. Ever since his father had the Bronze Sparrow Pavilion made, he has made it his own safe haven. As a boy, Cao Zhi always ran to the pavilion after a quarrel with Cao Pi or whenever he sought inspiration for a poem. It seemed like he was the only one who ever made use of the beautiful structure and probably could have made it his own fortress without anyone else noticing.

When his eyes fell upon the hillocks and the small pond, he immediately felt his anger subside. No matter what the emotion, the pavilion was always able to soothe him and that's what Zhi loved most about it. Perhaps it was the lovely surroundings or all the fond memories he has of the place that helped him relax. Yes, that's probably it: nothing awful is associated with the Bronze Sparrow Pavilion. Nothing can touch him there and he would not be able to think of a single bad thought under its tiled rooftop.

For the first time since the pavilion's completion, the young man saw another person resting in his refuge. Surprised, Cao Zhi slowly walked towards the enclosure and saw that the person was a woman. She sat on one of the benches with her legs up and knees bent into her chest, her back facing him. The maiden rested her head on one of the beams supporting the roof of the tiny structure. Although he could not see her face, Zijian knew that the woman was in deep thought and admiring the scenery.

"Beautiful day," Cao Zhi announced his presence as he walked up the steps of the Bronze Sparrow Pavilion.

Startled, the dainty figure on the bench quickly turned her head to find a man she has never met before. His eyes instantly perked up; he recognized this woman.

She cast off an uncertain look before replying, "Yes, it is."

To face the stranger, the woman turned her body around and sat properly with her legs planted firmly on the ground. Cao Zhi attempted to fix his expression into a neutral one so that his face would not reveal the twinge of excitement he felt. The day after his return to Xu Chang, he passed the maiden near the rear palace and was delighted to finally be able to meet her. After that day, he would find himself thinking of her briefly as a passing thought. The smell of the chrysanthemums in all the gardens, a group of consorts dining together, the luminous stars in the night sky—the man would be reminded of her by almost anything.

"I am Cao Zhi, son of Cao Cao."

She smiled and also introduced herself, "Lady Zhen, wife of Cao Pi."

Zijian felt his heart sink and his stomach jerk into a tight knot. In a cruel twist of fate, this woman—the one he thought of nearly every single day since he first saw her—turned out to be his brother's wife.

"So, we finally meet," the maiden murmured as she let out a small laugh. "I've heard a lot about you, Cao Zijian."

"Really?" Cao Zhi said in a tone that came out flatter than he intended.

Lady Zhen gave a curt nod. "Little Cangshu adores you and could not stop talking about you the day you returned. Ziwen, on the other hand, has been going on about how much you love your _zì_."

"Well, I _did_ just receive it about a week ago," he blushed.

"Why don't you have a seat, Brother?"

Brother. Zhi nearly cringed at the word, but caught himself before he could. She made room for him on the bench and he gladly obliged the offer.

"Thank you, Lady Zhen."

"You may call me Zhen Ji—or Ji, if that's what you prefer," the maiden chuckled.

* * *

"Chang'an sounds amazing," Zhen Ji sighed.

Cao Zhi nodded in agreement. "It is. I was able to meet with a number of scholars and saw a great deal of artisans working their craft."

"I never had the opportunity to travel much," she lamented, twirling her fingers. "My home county of Wuji in Zhongshan, the city of Ye, and now Xu Chang are the only places I've ever been."

"Well, that's something we need to fix!"

"What do you mean?"

"I need to take you around the kingdom, Ji! Chang'an, Luo Yang, Mount Hua—hell, let's go down south and see the Chang Jiang!" Cao Zhi laughed at his own jest.

Lady Zhen gasped playfully, "Oh, but what of Sun Quan and his mighty army?"

"I'm sure the two of us can get past those band of southerners. By the time we reach the Chang Jiang, we'll be experienced travelers capable of moving swiftly out of sight."

"The life of a nomad _does_ sound exhilarating," she agreed. "But there are so many places to see. Where would you take me first?"

"The first and very last place we'll visit will definitely be the Luo River."

Zhen Ji giggled, "Zijian, I've already seen the Luo River."

"No, not just passing by and glancing at it by the road. You have to really take it all in—the sights, sounds, sensations," he responded pensively.

"What's so fascinating about this particular river?"

The maiden regretted asking almost right away; Cao Zhi appeared a little stung by her question.

Reluctantly, he answered, "A dream or a vision. I'm not really sure what it was, but something came to me near the banks of the river one night."

Interested in the tale, Zhen Ji leaned in a bit closer and said not a word so that he could continue.

Cao Zhi was clearly growing embarrassed, but Ji's look of curiosity urged him on. "During my journey to Chang'an all those months ago, Rou Xin and I camped out near the Luo River for three nights. It stretches on for quite a bit, so I traveled near its edge for a couple of days.

"On the third night, I felt a warmth come over me. As my eyes flickered open, I swear I saw something or, perhaps, someone. It was a shade, a figure of a woman stepping into the river. When the moonlight peered through the clouds, she—she just vanished."

"You didn't see her face?"

"I thought I did. I thought I managed to catch a glimpse, but now I only see you in her place."

Astounded and unsure of how to reply, Zhen Ji remained silent and waited for him to say more.

He turned away in discomfort. "I'm sorry. I've never told anyone that story before, save for Rou Xin."

"No, you're right," she smiled brightly at him. "I must see the river again. I may even find something unexpected there, too."

Although he still felt like a fool for telling her what had occurred at Luo (not even _he_ was sure what happened that night), Cao Zijian returned her smile graciously. They were both amazed at how well they have gotten to know each other in just a few short hours at the pavilion: Lady Zhen was just a year older than he, they both had a great love for the language arts, he briefly learned about her past and childhood and she his. Neither one made sure not to divulge too much about themselves, though, for the more important matters would be saved for later should the two grow closer as friends.

"I truly understand why you find solace here at the pavilion, but I think we should head back to the palace," she expressed a little glumly, noticing the setting sun.

Cao Zhi stood up and reached out his hand to help the lady out of her seat. "I'm glad someone else appreciates this place."

As they both walked back towards the woods, they continued talking as if they were two old friends catching up for the first time in years. Completely comfortable in the other's presence, they laughed and joked amongst the trees. However, Cao Zhi considered it a bit odd that Lady Zhen has not even mentioned Cao Pi since she introduced herself as his wife. Wanting to see why and to test her, he decided to mention his brother nonchalantly.

"Oh, have I told you about the gift I was to receive?"

"No, what was it?"

"Your husband chose a consort for me," he snorted. "It's always been that way for years. Surely you know how the process goes?"

Zhen Ji shook her head.

"Emissaries are sent out every two or three years to a number of provinces to fetch hundreds of the most beautiful maidens. They are then brought back here and inspected carefully until only a handful of them are chosen to stay. Needless to say, I never approved of the spectacle yet my brothers would always hassle me into choosing a concubine," sighed Cao Zhi. "When Zihuan informed me of his gift, I, er, ended up snapping at him. He, of course, did not appreciate that and we both stormed off. That's actually why I came to the Bronze Sparrow—to cool off from the fight."

"Do you two argue a lot?"

He shrugged. "Sometimes. It was horrible when we were younger, but I like to think we learned how to behave ourselves as adults."

Passing the main garden and entering the courtyard, the two were now on the palace grounds and made their way inside.

"Defiant is the best way I'd describe my younger self—at least around Cao Pi," Zijian stated, breaking the silence.

"I'm curious," the maiden finally spoke. "Why do you not like having concubines?"

"To be completely honest, it's slavery. Hoarding as many women as possible into another building and using them only when needed is not my idea of pleasure. Sure, most—if not all—choose to stay here and enjoy their new lives as consorts, but—not to sound condescending—I believe it's only because they don't know any better. Knowledge is power, Ji, and so many girls are deprived of an education. That's how they remain ignorant of their lack of rights. Concubinage is the norm in this society and women are taught from birth that they're second best whose only purpose in life is to bear children. It's sad knowing that many end up believing it themselves."

Zhen Ji murmured, "D-do you really think that?"

"Yes, I do," he asserted proudly. "I've never told anyone that, at least not to this extent. My brothers and nearly everyone here in the palace knows how much I am against concubinage, but I've never really explained why. They just think I'm a bit daft."

"No, you're not."

"Hell, I've never even mentioned my abhorrence of polygyny," the man laughed. "That would stir up a lot more suspicion on my part."

At his words, Lady Zhen stopped in the middle of the hall. She looked up at him, her eyes beginning to tear up and her lip trembling slightly.

With great concern, he asked, "Ji, what's wrong?"

The woman shook her head and closed her eyes tightly.

Cao Zhi continued in a hushed voice, "Would it help to unburden yourself? Was it something I said, Ji? Please, talk to me."

She exhaled deeply as if physically releasing all of her grievances. "Thank you, Zijian. Everything you just said...was exactly what I needed to hear."

Though her tears stopped, Cao Zhi's concern did not waver. He quickly helped his friend next to the wall where they could discuss her worries further.

"I was just being truthful. Did that trouble you in any way?" he asked quietly.

"No, no," Zhen Ji assured her friend. "I'm just glad someone else shares the same views as I. Concubines, wives—all that and more have been disturbing my thoughts lately."

"Really?"

She nodded. "Yes. Back in the pavilion, I told you how I've come to befriend a few of Cao Pi's consorts, but I did not relinquish how toilsome it's become. I love my new friends while I find myself downtrodden around them. They're a pleasure to be around, but being with them serves as a constant reminder of how I have to share my husband with so many other women."

"All that you've kept inside yourself because you could not tell a soul..."

"Yes," Zhen Ji confirmed as her eyes welled with tears once more. "You have no idea how relieved I am to know that someone else feels the same way. Why is it so strange to think of a man and a woman together with no other to entangle themselves in their relationship?"

"I haven't a clue."

"Husband and wife, man and woman—that's the world I someday want to live in. I go on pretending to be fine, supporting everything Cao Pi does when I can't stand the thought of sharing him with another. I'm a coward, Zhi. You actually voice your thoughts despite what others may think of you and here I am keeping everything to myself for fear of rejection from society and, more importantly, my husband," deplored Zhen Ji with her eyes downcast, unable to look the man in the eyes.

"Would you warrant me an observation?"

The woman gave a light nod in response.

"I believe you do this so that you can please everyone else. You're not a coward, Ji, you just like going on peacefully with your life, void of quarrels. From what you've told me, you've been brought up this way. It's a difficult lesson to unlearn and you shouldn't be so stringent with yourself. It's one thing for me to go around complaining about society's faults, but for you to do so would not end well. You are a woman and women are expected to behave a certain way. Although you have not disclosed your true feelings to another until now, you should not doubt your courage. I admire you greatly for being against such needless traditions. I find it even more commendable that you, a woman, think this way."

"Thank you, Zijian," she sniffled before embracing him.

Caught off guard, Cao Zhi slowly closed his arms around Zhen Ji and held her close.

"For great change," he whispered in her ear.

Lady Zhen found herself grinning and softly echoed, "For great change."

They stayed that way for what felt like hours before she pulled away. "I feel so silly now for crying," laughed Zhen Ji as she rubbed her weary eyes.

"Don't. I could tell you've been troubled for—"

"Zhen Ji!" a voice yelled from afar.

The two friends turned to find Cao Pi rushing towards them. Before they could protest and explain themselves, the maiden was pulled away into her husband's arms.

"Ji, you're crying! What happened?"

His wife objected, "Zihuan, no, I'm fine—"

Cao Pi turned to the other man. "What did you do to her?!" he shouted angrily.

"Nothing!" cried Cao Zhi. "We were just talking, Brother!"

In a fit of rage, Cao Pi punched his younger brother with such force that he tumbled to the ground. Zhen Ji gasped and covered her mouth in horror as the fallen Zhi began bleeding profusely from his cut lip. Feeling for the wall, Cao Zhi staggered to his feet and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand before facing his assailant.

"Stay away from my wife," Zihuan snarled, grabbing Zhen Ji's arm and leading her down the hall.

**

* * *

**

**liu bo** (pinyin: _liù bó_; literally means "six sticks") – an ancient Chinese board game whose rules have been forgotten and was probably first played in the Zhanguo era (The Warring States, 4th century BC) and was supposedly very popular during the Han Dynasty

**ming** (pinyin: _míng_) – a person's given name

**zi** (pinyin: _zì_) – a person's style name

**

* * *

**

**Note: **This is the first chapter in FIVE MONTHS. I apologize for the very long wait. To be honest, I've had writers' block and found myself buried in school and work. Heh. x-x; It's spring break now, so I promised myself that I'd put up at least one new chapter. I'm aiming for one more, but I can't promise anything. Eep. ;X

I had no idea what to do for this chapter, seriously. I'm sorry if you think it's rubbish (definitely not worth the long wait), but it was the best I could crank out. Before I uploaded this, I decided to edit the previous chapters. They were just minor changes, but the most noticeable differences are the pinyin of the terms in the end glossary and the addition of a poem. It's by the Tang poet Li Shangyin which served as the inspiration for the title of this fanfic. I was saving it for the very last chapter, but I figured that wouldn't be for a long while so I decided to add it to all the chapters. :)

I don't know what the process of finding concubines was during the Han, so I borrowed it from The Travels of Marco Polo. I couldn't find a name for it, so...yeah. XD I'll just leave it nameless. Heh. Also, I have no idea what Lady Li's given name was, so I just made one up.

Again, I'd like to add another chapter before my break is over, but I can't promise anything because I'll be busy with Resident Evil 5. :3 So, if there's no new chapter out before the end of next week, you can blame Capcom and Chris Redfield. Harhar. :D

Feedback and reviews are always appreciated, thanks! :3 Writers love 'em and I'm no exception!


	5. Hush

**An Inch of Ashes**

_Chapter 5: Hush_

---

_The east wind sighs, the fine rains come:  
Beyond the pool of water-lilies, the noise of faint thunder.  
A gold toad gnaws the lock. Open it, burn the incense.  
A tiger of jade pulls the rope. Draw from the well and escape.  
Chia's daughter peeped through the screen when Han the clerk was young,  
The Goddess of the River left her pillow for the great Prince of Wei.  
Never let your heart open with the spring flowers:  
One inch of love is an inch of ashes._

The One Unnamed (II) by Li Shangyin

---

The maiden tossed and turned in her bed, unable to find a comfortable position. Two whole weeks has gone by and Zhen Ji still did not feel any better. At first she thought that it would be nothing to worry about, that whatever she had would pass in a couple of days and would not last for more than a week. Both Consort Li and Cao Zhi urged their friend to summon Hua Tuo, the court physician, immediately but it was not until today that she gave in to their requests. Now she wished she had heeded their pleas earlier and called upon Physician Hua the day she began feeling sick.

Zhen Ji groaned softly as she tossed around once more. The maiden constantly felt nauseous, had a perpetual headache, and was starting to feel a fever come on. The only time she ever remembered feeling so horrible was when she caught the flu from her sister, Zhen Rong, many years ago as a child. It was nearly the same, but the flu then was much worse. She was just hoping it was nothing too serious.

"Excuse my tardiness, Lady Zhen."

She turned her head to find Hua Tuo standing by the entrance of her chamber. He was surprisingly tall and stood up completely straight as if he were half his age. He had light brown eyes that emanated with kindness, a snow white beard, and bushy eyebrows that looked like the whiskers of a proud tiger. The shade of his robe was a fine purple, embroidered with silver and gold threads, and was most definitely a gift from Lord Cao Cao himself. She was told a few days ago by Lady Pan that when Lord Cao had heard of the man's talent and knowledge, he immediately summoned him to the capital and was named the court physician.

"Oh, no," coughed Zhen Ji. "Thank you so much for coming on such short notice, Doctor Hua."

"It is my duty as the physician of the court to help any in the palace," he smiled as he entered the woman's chamber.

"You can just pull up a chair from the table over there."

The doctor did as she suggested and placed the nearest chair right next to the maiden's bed. He carefully cleared the nightstand next to him so that he could have somewhere to place his medical bag. Hua Tuo opened it up, took out a small cookie, and handed it to the bedridden Zhen Ji.

"It's made of ginger and jasmine and will help with your nausea. Go on, eat it."

She gave a small nod as she accepted it. The maiden took a small bite and was pleasantly surprised at how good it tasted.

"Now, how long have you been feeling this way?" the physician asked intuitively.

"About two weeks now."

"I see..."

Hua Tuo reached over to place his palm on the maiden's forehead, checking her temperature. He scrunched his nose and shook his head without saying a word. The old man then turned over Zhen Ji's right hand to check her pulse. Once again, he shook his head slightly before turning around to scrounge through his bag. The silence was making her a little nervous, but she was confident that Hua Tuo knew exactly what he was doing. After all, if he didn't he would not be here in Xu Chang.

The doctor removed several little pouches along with a small mortar and pestle from his medical bag. He opened all the pouches and put a small amount of whatever was inside each of them into the mortar. For several long minutes, Hua Tuo sat hunched over the woman's nightstand, grinding and mixing the contents with the tiny pounder. When he finished, he pulled out an empty pouch from his bag and poured everything in the mortar into the pouch. He secured it tightly before handing it over to Zhen Ji.

"I concocted a special tea for you that contains lotus seed pod, chrysanthemum petals, peach tree leaves, barley, ginger, and other things that I think you'd rather not know of," he chuckled softly. "Drink two cups of it daily, right as you wake up and the other right before you go to bed. Just take a tiny pinch, put it in a teacup, and add boiling hot water. There's no need to brew a whole pot."

She gave a nod and a smile in reply. "Thank you, Doctor."

"I'll be checking up on you in a week. Get well, Lady Zhen," Hua Tuo said with a bow.

* * *

Although it has been over two weeks since Cao Pi had struck him down, Cao Zhi still felt nervous whenever he would see Zhen Ji, let alone talk to her. Being ordered by his brother to never see his wife again resonated strongly within him; he has not talked to Zihuan since that day. They came across each other a week after the incident, but they passed down the hall without so much as a nod or any sort of greeting. Zhi really didn't want to admit it, but he was indeed fearful of his elder brother and probably always has been. Perhaps the fear didn't sink in until he was actually physically hit by him. Even as a child, Zijian did not ever recall Cao Pi striking him down out of anger or frustration. It puzzled him, but all he knew at the moment was that he never wanted to provoke the elder one ever again.

Zijian turned to check the hall on both sides to see if anyone else happened to be there. He appeared to be alone. Figuring it was safe, the man proceeded to knock on the wooden double doors before him.

"It's me, Ji," he called out in a hushed voice.

"Oh, Zijian! Come in, come in!" the woman said from inside her private quarters.

Even though there was no one else nearby, Cao Zhi entered the maiden's chamber as quietly as possible. He was cautious wherever he went—especially if he was going to see Ji—just in case he ever ran into Cao Pi. If his brother knew he was visiting Zhen Ji in her own room, he would surely experience his brother's fury once again.

"I heard that you were visisted by Hua Tuo this morning," announced Cao Zhi as he pulled up a chair next to his friend's bed. "I decided to come over to see how you were doing."

The maiden chuckled, "Aw, how sweet of you, Zijian. I'm doing a lot better all thanks to Doctor Hua. He prepared a bag of tea for me and it appears to be working."

"Yes, that man is a miracle-worker," Zhi said as he thought of all the times Hua Tuo had helped him recover from all sorts of ailments ranging from broken bones to the common cold.

"How have you been?" asked Zhen Ji. "I haven't seen you in days!"

"My apologies. I've been very busy as of late," he lied.

"Well, you should get back to work then. I don't want to keep you from any of your duties," the woman smiled, fluffing her pillow at the same time.

"No, no. I have all the time in the world today."

Lady Zhen grinned. "Good! So, tell me about your day."

**

* * *

**

Out in the courtyard reserved only for training exercises, ten archery targets were lined up perfectly. They were all bare except for the one in the very middle which was riddled with arrows that were either right on or very near the bullseye. Cao Pi has been here for hours, not honing his technique but ruminating on all the events that had taken place the past few weeks. Zhen Ji explained to him what had happened before he found her and Cao Zhi together, but Cao Pi remained skeptical. There was a strange feeling inside him, leaving the man convinced that she did not tell him about everything that occurred before he spotted them in the hallway. He hated feeling this way and could not stand to admit it, but it greatly vexed him.

*******

"_Please, Zihuan, you're hurting me!"_

_Cao Pi, who was storming down the hallway to get away from his brother Zhi, has taken his wife with him. When he separated the two just moments before, he did not hold her hand or lead her away by her shoulder. No, instead he forcefully grabbed her by the wrist and refused to let go. At times he even squeezed his hand tightly at her expense as he replayed the moment over and over in his head. Just the thought of her in the arms of another man, no matter the intention, infuriated him. Today was the first time Zihuan has ever seen Ji that close to another. If it hadn't been his brother, Cao Pi knew he would have done something far more drastic than just striking him down._

_He angrily threw his wife's arm aside before turning around to face her. "What were you two doing?!"_

_Lady Zhen withdrew in fear at her husband's harsh tone. She has never seen him so furious._

"_We—we were just talking," she stammered out of nervousness and fright. "It was nothing, Zihuan. It was just a friendly hug—a hug one gives to comfort another."_

_Cao Pi asked angrier than he intended, "Why were you crying? People cry for a reason. What did he do to you?"_

"_No, he didn't do anything! Why do you keep assuming that? We were just talking. I'm sure you know how easily moved women are by words."_

"_Well, then, what did he say to you?"_

_The maiden drew a blank. Everything that happened in the past few minutes went by so fast, she did not even stop to think of what to tell her husband. All Zhen Ji knew was that she did not want to tell him the real reason why she was crying; that would only upset him even more._

_Unsure of what to say, Zhen Ji mumbled, "Um..."_

"_It's just a simple question," Zihuan said irritably._

"_Cao Zhi just... Well, we met for the first time today and I had heard of his marvelous poetry. I asked him to recite something for me," she lied._

"_Tell me the truth!" he hollered._

"_I am!" the maiden protested loudly. Afraid of what might happen to her, she quickly apologized, "I'm—I'm sorry for raising my voice like that. Believe me, my dear husband, that is what happened: your brother recited one of his poems at my request. It was so beautiful that I was moved to tears. I'm sure many others before me have done the same."_

_Pi exhaled deeply as he stood there to take everything in._

That's true, _the man thought to himself. _Many who hear or read my brother's poetry often do tear up.

"_No, Ji. I'm the one who should apologize. I immediately assumed the worst and...I shouldn't have yelled at you. I should not have struck my own brother. Forgive me."_

_She let out a sigh of relief. "Oh, Zihuan. There's no need to ask for forgiveness. I'm just glad we cleared up the issue at hand."_

_The couple stood across from each other, unsure of what else to say. Cao Pi looked toward the open window and noticed that the sun was already setting._

"_I have to take my leave now. I promised I'd meet Father to discuss some things."_

"_Oh, well, you mustn't keep Lord Cao waiting!" she laughed. "Go on, darling. I'll see you later tonight."_

_Zhen Ji gave her husband a bow before turning around to go back the way they came. She was most likely leaving to check on the stunned Cao Zhi. Although everything was now supposedly left out in the open, Zihuan still could not help but feel a twinge of jealousy overcome him. His wife claims to have told him the truth but he knew that there was something more, that something else happened between them. He could just tell she was hiding something and that greatly disturbed him._

Have I always been this paranoid? w_ondered Cao Pi._

*******

Despite trying to hide it from his father, Lord Cao Cao found out about the quarrel later that day and rebuked Cao Pi harshly. The days following the incident were some of the worst he's had in a while; he felt the disapproving stares of passersby everywhere he went and swore he could feel them gossiping relentlessly about him. Cao Pi regretted laying a hand on his brother, but he could not deny how satisfying it felt. Zihuan wanted to do something to Cao Zhi many times before, especially as a child, but always had the restraint not to. This time was very different, though; he snapped out of love for his wife. Although the two brothers had seen each other once the following week, neither one acknowledged the other. Cao Pi has not seen his younger brother since then.

He let out a loud sigh, "I should apologize to him."

The man wanted to apologize to the one he had wronged and physically hurt but he hated apologizing for anything, he hated making mistakes. Apologizing would mean he had made a mistake and that, to him, was unacceptable. As the eldest son of Lady Bian and Lord Cao Cao, Zihuan never had to apologize for anything. Being the son and soon-to-be heir of the greatest and most powerful warlord in the country gave him many privileges in life. Apologizing to others was something he would never get used to simply because it was something he never had to do.

"My Lord."

Cao Pi turned around to find the second-most beautiful woman (at least in his eyes) who resides in Xu Chang gracefully walking toward him. She was his favorite and most prized concubine, Lady Guo Nüwang. He did not tell a single soul, but he was planning on making the maiden his lawful wife before he had met Zhen Ji. Zihuan could always have several wives, but preferred having only one to give his entire heart to.

"My Lord," Lady Guo repeated with a bow. "I have not seen you at all today, so I decided to search the grounds for you."

He simply gave a curt nod in reply as he readied his bow.

"I'm sure you and I both agree—I know you better than anyone else here. You have not spoken to me about the incident involving your brother, Cao Zijian, but rumors and harsh words continue to float around the palace. Please, enlighten me, My Lord. What has been troubling you as of late?"

Cao Zihuan lowered his bow before saying, "That day has long passed and I have since put it behind me. It is resolved. There is nothing to discuss."

The man has no idea how much those words stung. It even angered her a little. Ever since he returned from Yecheng with another woman in his arms, he stopped seeking out Consort Guo altogether, even for a cup of tea or a short chat in one of the gardens. What frustrated her the most was how they have not been intimate in months—the last time they were together in Cao Pi's bed was right before he left Xu Chang to accompany Lord Cao Cao to Yecheng. She clearly remembers every detail and every sweet word he whispered into her ear that night.

_Sweet nothings,_ she thought bitterly.

The consort was extremely anxious to find out anything about Lady Zhen, but has not heard a single bad thing about her. The maiden needed to know if there was anything that could possibly be twisted around and used against her lover's wife. She needed to get the other woman out of Xu Chang as soon as possible or she would surely lose her mind. The concubine was surprised she has not yet done so.

"Very well, My Lord," murmured Lady Guo. "You know that I am just looking out for your best interests."

"Yes, of course. Thank you, Nüwang."

With those words, the concubine bowed before Cao Pi once more and left as he continued to practice his archery. With a scowl etched on her face, she then turned around to return to the rear palace. Lady Guo knew that she would have eventually been made his wife had it not been for the interference of Zhen Ji. She vowed long ago when Lady Zhen first arrived at Xu Chang that she would get rid of the woman so that she could finally take her place as Cao Pi's right hand. No matter how long it would take, Lady Guo was determined to succeed and win back Zihuan for herself.

**

* * *

**

A week has passed and Zhen Ji was feeling much better. She still has aches and pains, but her fever was gone and she actually felt well enough to move around and visit her friends in the rear palace. Just the other day, the maiden had gone off to the Bronze Sparrow Pavilion for the first time in weeks.

She thought it was unnecessary for Hua Tuo to return to give her a check-up since she was a lot better, but knew the physician was simply doing his job. Hopefully, today would be the last time the maiden would see the man for a long while.

_I'll definitely summon him as soon as I feel anything, though, _she thought. _That tea of his really is something!_

There was a knock on her door, announcing the arrival of the physician.

"Come in, Doctor!"

The old man stepped inside and bowed. "I see you're feeling well."

"Oh, yes, Doctor Hua. That tea you made for me started working as soon as I drank it!"

He chuckled, "Ah, yes. Modesty is a fine quality to possess, but that completely escapes me as soon as someone mentions my teas! I _am_ very good at making them, aren't I?"

The two shared a loud laugh together before the physician pulled up a chair next to the woman's bed. This time around, she was not lying down out of weariness but she was sitting upright and eagerly awaited good news.

"Now, there are a couple of things I'd like to get a start on as soon as this check-up is done with. Please, bear with me, My Lady."

**

* * *

**

For the first time in weeks, Zhen Ji has never felt more alive. Hua Tuo's visit went very smoothly. So well, in fact, that she was on her way to find Cao Pi to tell him that she has officially recovered from whatever it is she had. The maiden briskly walked down the hallway and into the nearest courtyard. A servant she passed a moment ago claimed to have spotted Zihuan near the rear palace so she immediately made her way over. It took a while, but she was finally getting used to the gargantuan palace of Xu Chang and knew how to get to most places quickly. After exiting, the maiden made her way down another walkway into the next courtyard which would then lead her outside the rear palace.

Turning sharply, the woman almost ran right into Cao Zhi, who also appeared to be in a hurry.

"Zhi!" she gasped. "You gave me a fright!"

"Sorry, Ji, didn't see you there," he laughed. "Where are you heading off to?"

"I'm searching for Cao Pi. And yourself?"

"Oh, a servant found me in one of the gardens and informed me that Zihuan wished to see me."

Her eyes went wide with disbelief. She asked in excitement, "Really?"

Cao Zijian nodded, "Yes, I'm a bit nervous, but I think we can get through our talk without one of us getting beaten up."

"What a coincidence that we're both going off to meet Zihuan. Let us look for him together!"

"Erm, sure," Zhi hesitated. He was afraid of what might happen if his brother were to see him with his wife.

They both turned and walked side-by-side towards the rear palace, hoping to find Cao Pi nearby.

"Do you have any idea what he wants to talk to you about?"

"I'm guessing it's over what happened weeks ago the last time the three of us were altogether," he said nervously.

"Aw, don't worry too much, Zhi," the maiden shot him an encouraging smile. "I'm sure he just wants to apologize to you."

In a hushed voice, barely above a whisper, Cao Zhi asked, "So, what did you tell him about what happened that day?"

Zhen Ji began to speak quietly in response, "I told him that I asked you to recite one of your poems for me and that I was moved to tears by it."

"Oh," the man said in surprise. "Wow, that's a good one, Ji. You think well under pressure, don't you?"

"It just came to me. I was struggling at first, but after I told him that little white lie, everything else fell into place. I wish I wasn't forced to lie to him, but you and I both know that the situation would have grown worse if he learned the truth."

"Hey, Ji."

"Yes?"

"Why are we whispering?"

"I was only whispering because you were, idiot!" she laughed.

"Cao Zhi." The two friends immediately fell silent as they heard a third voice. A puzzled Cao Pi asked, "Ji? What are you doing here?"

"I was on my way to see you, My Lord," Lady Zhen answered with a deep bow. "I just happened to run into Cao Zhi since he, too, was searching for you."

Suspicion fell over him once more. "Ah, I see..."

"Well, since you summoned him, I shall step aside and wait my turn." She bowed again before moving to the other side of the walkway.

The two brothers faced each other properly for the first time in weeks. The air about them was awkward, but that was only to be expected.

Cao Pi decided to speak first. "So, you're probably wondering why I called you."

"Just a bit," said Cao Zhi.

"As my brother, you know how difficult it is for me to say this, but I wanted to apologize to you about my behavior the last time we saw each other."

"It's fine, Zihuan. I'm just glad you know what happened now. Let's just hope that day never repeats itself," the younger one laughed.

"Agreed," nodded Pi. He then turned his head toward his wife. "Ji, you wanted to speak to me?"

Zhen Ji hurriedly went over to the two brothers and proceeded to whisper something in her husband's ear. Full of surprise and excitement, Cao Pi's normally stoic face immediately transformed into one full of glee. He embraced his wife and picked her up off her feet, much to her surprise and enjoyment. While the couple laughed in merriment, Cao Zhi stood there in utter confusion.

"I'm sorry, Zhi," the maiden said as her husband placed her down. "I just wanted to tell Zihuan before anyone else and I'm so glad that you're here to be the second to know!"

"To know what?" he asked, still very baffled.

"Doctor Hua told me the best news of my life after my check-up today. Zijian, I'm with child!"

Before Cao Zhi could congratulate his friend and his brother, Cao Pi picked up his wife once again as he threw his head back in laughter. The younger one has never seen his brother this happy before and decided to remain silent for his benefit. Today was their day and he wanted them to enjoy every minute of it. The laughter of the proud parents-to-be suddenly died down. Zihuan gave Zhen Ji a warm, loving look as he took a minute to admire her. He could not believe how unbelievably fortunate he was to have such a beautiful, thoughtful, and dutiful woman as his partner and wife. The couple then kissed passionately, unable to contain their excitement.

Smiling, Zijian walked away from the couple to let them revel in their moment together.

**

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**

**Note:** Holy crap, it took me a long time to update (again! Dx). I apologize for making my lovely readers wait again for a sub par chapter. I'd blame the lack of updates on school, but it's summer now! Yay! I'll try desperately to update regularly again, but it's a doozy. This chapter took a long time to write because I was having a horrible case of writers' block. Welps, the infamous Lady Guo has finally made her debut appearance! You'll be definitely seeing more of her later on. I know this chapter feels really rushed and just blah but I hope y'all liked it. OGAWD, I have so many stories I need to read and catch up on, too. Argh. D:

Ignore any and all typos, please. I recheck and reedit my stories, but there's always at least two typos that elude me!! Rawr, I just finished editing the previous chapters too. Anywho, reviews and feedback are always appreciated. :3 I admit it: I live for feedback. Teehee.


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